BAGGAGE CLAIM: RELEASING THE WEIGHT WE CARRY FROM RELATIONSHIP BAGGAGE 

In this episode, we will discuss how to drop relationship baggage that’s been holding us back. Past relationships and childhood trauma create emotional baggage in current relationships. I want to help you move toward releasing that today. We will explore how to identify the types of baggage we have, how they show up in our relationships, and how we release them to move forward. We need to reflect on past experiences and consequent wounds that may contribute to the weight we carry, the things that trigger us and also affect how we navigate relationships. Learn today how to pack light! Now let’s delve into the importance of acknowledging and releasing the weight of our past to have healthier and more fulfilling relationships.

Five Types of Relationship Baggage:

1- Guilt: Feeling guilty even if you have or haven’t done anything wrong

2- Regret: Wishing you had behaved differently or made different choices

3- Fear and worry: Waiting for something bad to happen

4- Past Emotional and Physical Abuse: Abuse can contribute to building walls and affecting trust in relationships.

5- Lack of Boundaries: Fear of rejection can lead to difficulty saying no and setting healthy boundaries.

How Emotional Baggage Shows Up in a Relationship

Relationship baggage (or emotional baggage) shows up in relationships in a myriad of ways, often undetected. Here are some signs that you may be carrying around emotional baggage.

1- You are exhibiting signs of codependence and enabling, or you have a lack of boundaries.

2- You are easily triggered or angered, or maybe you often feel shame or hurt in your relationships. Unresolved trauma from past relationships or childhood experiences causes reactions to situations on a magnified, escalated level.

3- You might be controlling. Those who try to control outcomes likely have unresolved issues and fears.

4- You may feel afraid to say no because you fear the outcome of what might happen if you stand up for yourself (similar to a lack of boundaries).

Releasing Relationship Baggage

1- Work on yourself and self-care: study the Bible or self-help books, absolve insecurities, and practice self-reflection by taking inventory of yourself to become a better you and a better partner.

2- Ask, don’t assume. Ask for clarification, do not assume that the other person is behaving in the same way as someone from your past.

3- Press the reset button on your relationship.  Your present is not your past! Love without keeping score.

4- Renounce old vows. Renounce any “I will never…” statements. These are vows you have made in the past that, though may have seemed helpful at the time, can actually hinder you from moving forward.

5- Stop sleeping around. It creates unnecessary soul ties that lead to even more baggage.

I hope you find this podcast helpful in identifying the types of relationship baggage we lug around, how it shows up in your life, and how you release it to move forward in your present relationships by learning to pack light!

These show notes are an abridged version of the audio podcast. Be sure to listen to the full episode to get all the nuggets!

LINKS MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:  

Episode 143-Overcoming Father Wounds-Kia Stephens

Episode 39- Understanding Your Core Wounds & Avoiding Toxic Relationships-Dr. Janie Lacy

Get your Love Is Devotional here!

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