8 Ways to Have Faith in Your Marriage Again

I scrolled through the responses in a recent email where I’d asked, “Who has lost faith in your marriage?” One response gripped my heart, taking me back to a time where I, too, had been tempted to give up hope in my own marriage. A particular reply captured the essence of why I posed the question in the first place.  “I want to believe God that things can change, but I just don’t see how it ever will.” I felt this woman’s pain. I wished I could have reached through my computer screen, took her sweet face in my hands, looked her in the eyes and said, “I know you can’t see it, but that’s what faith is . . . believing what you cannot see.”

Faith takes us to another realm of reality. The Bible actually defines faith as the evidence of what is not seen  (Hebrews 11:1). Having faith in your marriage requires you to look beyond the problems staring you in the face and ahead to what you’re believing God for . . . what you cannot see. Faith is more than hope. It’s an act of surrender, and it’s an act of trust. Faith requires us to shift our focus. It’s an active decision to tap into something deeper than logic or our own understanding (Proverbs 3:5-6).

I recently spoke to a group of wives on the topic of “How to Have Faith in your Marriage Again.” I had woken up a few mornings prior and heard the Lord tell me to read Hebrews 11. I wasn’t actually planning my talk to these ladies yet, but as I began reading, I knew the Lord was downloading His words for these precious women to my heart. Here is what I believe God wants everyone who is trusting Him for a turnaround in their marriage to know:

8 Ways to Have Faith in Your Marriage Again

1. Speak Life

Hebrews 11:3 reminds us that God spoke the world into existence. He didn’t just think good thoughts. He didn’t simply imagine what a beautiful world would look like. He spoke it. We are made in God’s image, and what we speak comes to life . . . whether good or bad (Proverbs 18:21). What kind of words are you speaking? Are you speaking divorce or restoration over your marriage? Speaking life is the first thing you need to change in order to have faith in your marriage again.

2. Know Faith Pleases God

Did you know that without faith it is impossible to please God? Think about that. Hebrews 11:6 spells it out in black and white. I often hear women speak life over their marriages but in the next breath, they talk about what they will do if things don’t change. If you want to please God, you must live by faith. God is willing and ready to act, so we must not uncover our prayers with doubt.

3. Check Your Motivation

What is motivating you to have faith in your marriage? Is it just so that you can have a happy life? Is it so that you can prove your parents or in-laws wrong? I love how Hebrews 11:7 talks about Noah’s dedication to obey God because he was “motivated by godly fear.” The fear of the Lord is something we don’t talk much about anymore. It’s a shame, really, because Proverbs 9:10 teaches that, “the fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom . . .” When you’re at your wit’s end, check your motivation. Allow the fear of the Lord to guide you as you wait for him to act on your behalf.

4. Purpose to See Your Family Delivered

Having a good marriage is about more than you and your spouse. If you have children, they need you to be restored. When I got married, I purposed in my heart that my husband, Shaun, and I would break the cycle of divorce in our family. Hebrews 11:7 tells us that Noah built the ark to deliver his family. All hell had broken loose in his world, but Noah purposed that his family would be saved. Follow in his footsteps. Have faith in your marriage as you determine that your family will be delivered.

5. Stay

Someone needs to hear this word: stay. “By faith, he stayed . . .” (Hebrews 11:9). Sometimes, you just have to dig your heels in and stand your ground. One of the hardest things to do is to stay in your marriage when you really want to leave. But Ephesians 6:13 encourages us: “Therefore, put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to withstand in the evil day, and, having done all, to stand.” Don’t you know that you’re in a battle? Where are your weapons? What are you doing to stand against the evil coming against you? Commit to stay.

ALSO READ: How to Maintain a Marriage for a Lifetime

6. Look Forward

It’s hard to move forward when you keep looking back. Hebrews 11:10 tells us that Abraham was “looking forward” to what he had not yet experienced. If you are to have faith in your marriage, you, too, must look forward to change. Look forward to progress. Put the past behind you and expect God to move on your behalf. As you wait, encourage yourself with someone else’s testimony of how God restored their marriage. 

7. Follow God’s Design

I love how Hebrews 11:10 describes God as the architect and builder. Do you believe that marriage was designed by God? He is the one who is drawing the plans for your marriage. He is designing it to be beautiful. But he doesn’t stop there. He’s also the builder. Psalm 127:1 says, “Unless the Lord builds a house, the workers labor in vain.” Yes, you have work to do, but take your cues from the master builder himself. Often, we get ahead of God and start making our own plans. That’s when it all falls apart. Trust God to build your marriage. He’s the architect and the contractor.

8. Believe God’s Promises

It’s hard to believe God’s promises when you don’t know them. In order to truly have faith in your marriage, you need to read the Word. Speaking of Sarah in the Bible, Hebrews 11:11 says, “she considered that the one who had promised was faithful.” Faithful to do what? To keep his promises. God does not lie. If he said he is able, he is able. If he said your dry bones will live (Ezekiel 37), they will! God can bring dead things back to life! Yes, even your marriage. He did it for Abraham and Sarah. Their bodies were both “dead,” but new life sprang forth anyway (see Hebrews 11:12). He is the God of the impossible!

There you have it. Eight ways to have faith in your marriage again. Side note . . . do you know that the number eight, in the Bible, represents new beginnings? There’s a word for you. Believe it. God wants to do something new in your marriage? Now let him.

 

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