189: Mom Guilt: Rage, Remorse & Becoming a Loving Parent When Running on “E”

Nov 14, 2023

Mom Guilt: Rage, Remorse & Becoming a Loving Parent When Running on “E”

Mom guilt. It’s a real thing that nearly all moms feel. I’ve been there, feeling overwhelmed and out of control due to my parenting fails. Add anger and unmet needs to the equation, and you’ve got a recipe for rage and remorse. Today, we’re explicitly focusing on rage and anger management. Our guest, Elizabeth Andreyevskiy, transparently shares her story and insights, which I believe will be a game-changer for many moms.

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My personal journey with mom guilt began in the early stages of motherhood and marriage. I found myself unprepared for the challenges of raising kids and my lack of discipline strategies. The result was anger, often spiraling into rage. This journey wasn’t easy, but it made me realize the importance of addressing my unmet needs and learning more productive, loving, and effective parenting strategies.

Christians, Mom Guilt, and Self-Care

Elizabeth shared her own experiences, highlighting that many moms feel tremendous shame and guilt, especially within Christian contexts. She described her first instance of mom rage, triggered by exhaustion and feeling out of control. Her journey, much like mine, involved understanding her triggers and learning to manage them.

A significant theme we discussed was the importance of self-care. It’s not just about external activities like massages or bubble baths but internal practices such as affirmations, reading the Bible, and setting boundaries. We discussed the idea of waking up before your kids to establish a sense of control and prepare for the day, a habit that dramatically shifted both of our lives.

We also explored the difference between guilt and shame. While guilt can be productive, leading to change and repentance, shame is destructive and counterproductive. It’s about not letting the shame of past actions dictate our future but learning to forgive ourselves and grow from our experiences.

Listener Takeaways:

  • For Singles: If you’re a single parent dealing with mom guilt, remember the importance of self-care. Taking time for yourself is not selfish; it’s necessary for your mental and emotional well-being. Establish routines that allow you personal space, even if it’s just a few quiet moments before your day begins.
  • For Married Couples: Communication with your partner is crucial in managing mom guilt. Discuss your needs, feelings, and strategies for parenting. Support each other in taking time for self-care and personal growth, understanding that it benefits not just the individual but the entire family.
  • For Church Leaders: Recognize the challenges parents in your congregation face, especially around mom guilt. Offer support groups or counseling services that provide a safe space for parents to share their struggles and learn healthy coping mechanisms. Encourage a culture of grace and understanding, rather than judgment, within the community.

This episode isn’t just about managing mom guilt; it’s about transforming it into a journey of healing from old wounds, trusting God to mend your messes, and becoming the best version of God’s gift to your children. Check out Elizabeth’s offerings linked below, and remember, seeking help is a strength, not a weakness. Let’s break free from the shackles of mom guilt and rage, and walk towards a healthier, more fulfilling, and loving parenting experience.

Links Mentioned in this Episode

Take my free “How Connected a Partner Are You” Quiz!

Elizabeth Andreyevskiy Special Offer for RRT Listeners 

EP: 188 How To Resist Temptation

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